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Sunday, August 26, 2007

Go Ahead. Rob the Bank. (Or: Martin Lewis is an Ass.)

Hey, buddy, if you really want to do a favor, you’d go rob that bank. Look, I wouldn’t encourage you to do anything illegal, and I’ve researched it for, like, ten minutes, and you’ve got a total right to rob the bank. I’m not asking you to do anything that could get you in trouble, I just want you to, you know, rob the bank.

Ignore all those folks who say that neither the Constitution nor the UCMJ give you the authority to rob the bank. I utterly reject the use of any force or illegal action of any kind and specifically reject and condemn any calls for it. I just call on you to speak your conscience and to do your ethical, moral duty to rob that bank.

Like I said--and will keep saying no matter how often I’m shown to be wrong in my assumptions--I’m not asking you to do anything illegal. It says right here that you have the right to rob the bank. Which is nice because I’m pretty certain you want to rob the bank.

So, go ahead. You know you want to.

(Bolded sentence taken from Lewis’ response to Charles Byrd at 09:58 pm on 25 August. Idiot. And, no, it doesn’t work as satire, either.)

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