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Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Seriously. Not All Blonds Are Stupid

Debra Lafave, former teacher and child molester, had some interesting words of wisdom about her legal battle. According to the snippets released on CNN her interview with Matt Lauer really brought out her inner dumb blond.

Debra Lafave, 25, who became a tabloid sensation after her arrest in 2004, also acknowledges that her victim might “have a hard time trusting women one day. I’m sure he has to be living with the guilt of—quote, unquote—ratting me out,” according to transcripts of the interview with Matt Lauer released by NBC Tuesday. The interview was to air Wednesday on the “Today” show and “Dateline NBC.”

Lafave is serving three years of house arrest and seven years of probation after pleading guilty to having sex with the boy in a classroom and her home in June 2004. Her plea in November negated the need for a trial during which the victim would have been called to testify.

Lafave has apologized and said bipolar disorder contributed to her state of mind at the time.

She told Lauer she never thought she was committing rape when she had sex with the teen but realizes now she “made a really, really, really bad choice.” She acknowledges that the case got so much attention—when similar cases get little or none—because she is attractive.

“Sex sells,” she said.

Lafave said she has a difficult time thinking of herself as a sexual predator, as she is now classified under Florida law.

“I was a kindhearted person who loved children, who would never, you know, do anything to break the law,” she said. “I was a good person. And then, now everything has just changed. So it’s just really hard for me to accept that.”

So, get this, she’s a kindhearted person who loves kids, wouldn’t break the law, and only had sex with a young boy under some pretty odd circumstances because she was feeling a little bi-polary that month. Only she did break the law in a really big way, she did have sex with a young boy under some pretty odd circumstances when she really should have known better, and it’s her love of kids (in the bad way) that got her in trouble in the first place.

For all that, we get to hear about how the sexual predator doesn’t think of herself as a sexual predator because, while she didn’t think of it as rape, she thinks it was a “really, really, really bad choice.” Sometimes really, really, really bad choices are precisely the things that get you tagged as a sexual predator; especially when they lead you to become sexually involved with one of your 14 year old students. No matter how much the boy wanted to do it, the adult is supposed to know better.

Deb Lafave is an idiot who was lucky to get a relatively light sentence; if she had been a male gym coach carrying on with a 14 year old girl, the resulting public outcry and sentence would likely have been a lot more painful. Yet she is idiot enough to find excuses for inexcusable behavior, shallow enough to think that she really needs to share her side of the story in a nationally televised interview, and really tone-deaf enough to think that calling it a “really, really, really bad choice” somehow manages to make her more sympathetic or her actions more understandable.

Despite the title, I’m pretty sure that her stupidity isn’t related to her hair color; it’s goes straight to the bone.

Read the story.

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Simply pisses me off how lightly that bitch got off.  She should have been locked up for years.  And more.  And what the hell is wrong with people that they would even stand by and listen to her pathetic side of the story?  She RAPED a child!  Do they not get the concept?

I’m shutting up now before I start really venting.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 07:19 AM

While it doesn’t excuse her behavior, and even she says she should be punished for what she did, it did come out in the interview that she had been sexually abused as a youngster.  Having known several women with sexual abuse in their past, I have seen firsthand how it can warp one’s view of sexuality, from one extreme to the other.  Add in her apparent panic attacks, phobias, and suicide attempts, and you’ve got someone in serious need of help.

And, you know, it sounds a bit flippant, but if Mrs. Mullins had come on to me in Algebra I, I can’t say I would have said no.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 10:15 AM

OMG I cannot believe you just said that!  And if the genders had been reversed?  If it was a male teacher and female student?  No Andy, it’s wrong.  Period!  No NO NO!!!

And sexual abuse in your childhood does not excuse it.  Been there.  And you dont’ see me abusing boys.

I’m sorry, but your flippant reply is what is wrong with this whole situation.  Rape of a child, any child regardless of what gender, is fucking wrong.

What you have with her in someone in serious need of being locked up and kept away from children.  Period.  Her childhood sucked.  So fucking what!  So did alot of other people’s and they aren’t going around screwing up children’s lives.  Deal with it.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 10:26 AM

No Andy, it’s wrong.  Period!  No NO NO!!!

I never said it wasn’t.

And sexual abuse in your childhood does not excuse it.  Been there.  And you dont’ see me abusing boys.

I never said it did excuse it.

I’m sorry, but your flippant reply is what is wrong with this whole situation.  Rape of a child, any child regardless of what gender, is fucking wrong.

I never said it wasn’t.

Her childhood sucked.  So fucking what!  So did alot of other people’s and they aren’t going around screwing up children’s lives.  Deal with it.

Bipolar individuals can’t just deal with it.  It requires constant medication, and if not properly identified by medical professionals will remain a problem no matter how much the person wishes they were “normal.”

Mental illness is not something one just chooses to get over.  The brain is a tricky space and what was once merely sad thoughts can become chemical depression, your reaction to an event doesn’t mean everyone will react the same (e.g. people with phobias, of which I also have deep personal experience).

So, once again, I’m not saying that she did nothing wrong and I’m not saying she should not be punished in some way.  I am saying, however, that refusing to attempt even to understand how someone can do the things she did is the surest way to ensure it happens again and again and again.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 10:41 AM

Andy, you replied as a typical male with that flippant “oh if it was me, I’m not sure I would say no” response.  Please!  And if she has mental issues, there is help out there before she goes off and rapes a child.  Oh hell, there is lots of help out there.  She’s a teacher.  Was.  She knows this.  Not like she was living in a vacuum.

And I understand these people just fine, from personal experience as well, and still have no issue with saying if they harm a child, they should be locked up.  They either seek the help they need, learn to deal with it in some way, or something, but cross the line and harm a child --- screw them.

Sorry but screwed up head or not, you know right from wrong, and messing with children is wrong.  Depressed or not, bi-polar or not, you do not fuck up where kids are concerned.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 11:17 AM

Put another way: if you know your mind is not fully healthy (and she sure seems to have known hers wasn’t), the responsible thing to do is to seek help and remove yourself from situations where you will harm someone innocent.

She was sexually abused, and it affected her view of sex.  Then she chose to work with kids.  She did not seek help in channeling her sexual urges.  Now she has damaged a child’s vew of sex, In effect she asked to be let off lightly for committing sexual abuse because of the results of her own experiences of being sexually abused.  This is the sexuality version of murdering your parents and begging clemency on account of being an orphan.

I am also very sick of people who say, in one way or another, “I take full responsibility for my mistake, so you don’t have to punish me.” How is that taking any responsibility?

on Sep 14 2006 @ 05:44 PM

The implication should be clear, but if it isn’t:

One of the reasons we don’t punish minors for many crimes is a recognition that their age/maturity makes it impossible for them to be truly responsible for their choices.  Agree or disagree with the wisdom of that if you will.  We also treat manslaughter different than pre-meditated murder, even though the person is just as dead.  Obviously, our legal system punishes the failure to act responsibility more than the act itself.

Thus, even aside from all the obstacles to good judgment, she was still the adult, and her failure to fulfill her responsibility is what should be punished.  From that perspective, she got off (um, sorry, unintential until I re-read it...but I’ll leave it in for grins) way too lightly.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 05:48 PM

In effect she asked to be let off lightly for committing sexual abuse because of the results of her own experiences of being sexually abused.

Is anyone actually bothering to read the interview?  I guess not, as she says, quite clearly, that she thinks she belongs in jail for what she did.

However, our justice system does not work that way.  She’s under house arrest and is a registered sex offender; her life is never going to be easy again, but I found her in the interview to be quite aware of how improper her behavior was and how she has worked to change things.  I’m ok with that.

If she does it again, put her away for a long, long time.

on Sep 14 2006 @ 07:33 PM

I read an interview with her.  I didn’t get the same stuff as you out of it, apparently. [shrug]

on Sep 14 2006 @ 10:41 PM
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