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Thursday, November 17, 2005

No More Pork Rinds, No More Short Skirts, No More Gay Guys Lip-Synching to Disco

For some people, the war on terror most certainly is about religion, most certainly doesn’t stop at some imaginary border around the Middle East, and most certainly involves the West ending its Liberal ways.

Osama bin Laden wants the United States to convert to Islam, ditch its constitution, abolish banks, jail homosexuals and sign the Kyoto climate change treaty.

The first complete collection of the Saudi’s statements published today portrays a world in which Islam’s enemies will take the first steps towards salvation by embracing the “religion of all the Prophets”.

Kindly Osama bin Laden wants to save us; war is his evangelical crusade to make the world a better place. A place where women are covered up, kept uneducated, and chained to lives of subservience. It would be a place where there wouldn’t even be a conversation about abortion rights, same sex marriage, or the separation of church and state. It would definitely be a place where drag shows with sparkly gay men lip-synching to Diana Ross tunes would be entirely out of the question.

Understanding Osama and his crusade is key to understanding why the United States is knee deep in the ugliest politics in the world. Why did the United States overthrow the government in Afghanistan? Why did the United States lead a coalition of countries into Iraq--essentially making a huge bet that it could quickly and easily overthrow Saddam Hussein and then find a way to set up a relatively liberal government in the middle of our enemies and, frequently, reluctant allies?

Understand the aims of Osama’s terrorist organization and then it becomes obvious why the United States and our allies have to find a way to be successful in ushering in change in the political and social structures of the Middle East--and, ultimately, throughout the failed nations in Africa and Asia. The kind of failure that Representative Murtha suggests (and, apparently, has suggested in the past) is much greater than merely losing a little respect in the international community, it’s waving the white flag in our entire endeavor.

Democracy isn’t just a Christmas present we’re trying to give to people around the world, it’s the path to bolstering our national security. The war against the West isn’t just crankiness about troops on Saudi soil or our support of Israel. It was a war declared against us because we don’t conform to a very specific Muslim ideal.

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I have my own idea of how to make the world a better place—a place where Osama bin Laden is covered up with about six feet of dirt, in a shroud made of pig leather.

The women covered up though, not so much. In fact, the really hot ones, not at all.

on Nov 18 2005 @ 06:57 AM

But what are you willing to blow up to make your dreams come true?

on Nov 18 2005 @ 07:26 AM
Rae

Z, the description of Osma’s perfect world sounds like that of any fundamentalist ideal, Jewish, Muslim, or Christian.

One of my favorite jokes:

Person dies and goes to Heaven.  Paul gives Person the grand tour. Person is awed. When tour ends, Person asks Paul about a wall seen in the distance.  Paul tells Person, “That’s for the fundamentalists.  They didn’t think anyone else was going to get in.”

on Nov 18 2005 @ 03:57 PM

"But what are you willing to blow up to make your dreams come true?”

That’s the most twisted self-help slogan I’ve ever heard.

on Nov 19 2005 @ 12:09 AM

Catchy, isn’t it?

Somebody should use that somewhere…

on Nov 19 2005 @ 12:21 AM

No more short skirts ... blasphemy!

on Nov 19 2005 @ 08:11 AM

But what are you willing to blow up to make your dreams come true?

Her name is Lenore.

Oh wait—you meant “blow up” in a different sense, didn’t you?

on Nov 19 2005 @ 09:23 AM

No More Gay Guys Lip-Synching to Disco

Bastards! They must be stoppped.

on Nov 20 2005 @ 08:44 PM
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