I chose American Idol out of a sense of tradition and obligation (mixed almost equally)--but I’m going to be flipping back and forth to make the g-phrase cranky…

Jordin Sparks does Pat Benatar’s “Heartbreaker"--which might just count as contemporary music in this crowd--and does a fun, energetic, but ultimately totally straight take on the song. Not bad, not special.

Avs Update: 3-2 over Buffalo with a bit over ten minutes left in the game. They are still pretty likely to miss the playoffs for the first time that I can remember, but this late-season surge has been a lot of fun to watch.

Messy might be the best short description for Sabrina Sloan’s (hubba hubba) performance. There were moments where she sounded wonderful, but those moments were mixed in with some bad notes and screechy singing. I’m not impressed.

Antonella, you hussy. Now about the singing: bad voice, marginal song choice, weak performance, vocals that got lost underneath the music and the background singers, and almost no personality to speak of.

Shut up, Paula, you idiot. Simon says, “You’ve gone as far as you can go, Antonella.” I would disagree: she’s gone far longer in this show than she should have, but his main point is appreciated. I will agree with him, though: she really didn’t deserve the media storm that came from her nekkid pictures. Whoever put those pictures out is a serious jerk.

But whatever sympathy I had for her was killed off when she said that she wished the judges wouldn’t compare her to anyone else. She does realize that this is a competition, right? That the only way that “America” finds a winner is by comparing the singers and deciding which one they like the most.

Paula and Antonella should get together, and, you know, compare IQs.

Avs Update II: The Avs win another won to keep their slender playoff hopes alive. That’s five straight, pal.

Wow. Haley Scarnato (who gets more hubbas than any of the other contestants) sounded decent tonight, but she was singing one of the worst possible songs for this competition. It was a total Disney moment completely sans sexuality, tension, or anything even vaguely memorable. She is a tremendously beautiful woman, but she is so mild, so tepid that every week I’m surprised to see her again--amazed that this person is on the show and who the hell is she anyway? Simon’s right: I don’t remember her name more than a few minutes after the show is over. That can’t be good.

Stephanie, has an entirely different problem. She has a strong voice and great stage presence, but her performance was way off. She was screaming through parts, she missed notes, and she was off the music a few times--Paula was completely off. It wasn’t a near “flawless” performance.

Okay, maybe it’s me that is off because even Lakisha doesn’t sound up to her usual high standards. She still makes the most of her presence on stage and she definitely sounds best of the singers so far tonight, but there were a couple painful moments. Still, as I said, better than the rest tonight. So far. “Passion, talent, believability...and, of course, the ‘yo’ factor...”

Who doesn’t love Gina? At least, until she breaks out Pickle and Troll? Pickle and Troll kind of creep me out, if you want to know the truth.

While the outfit wasn’t so great, she did do a credible rock grrl performance complete with glimpses of her pierced tongue and a few growly moments. Which might not win her a lot of fans out in the tweenerville hell that is American Idol, but which I appreciated. Pitch problems? Sure. But it was one of the most fun of songs of the night, and she out rocks any of the pseudo-rocker boys that were on the show the last few years. Constantine, eat your heart out.

And, anyway, the drummer kicked ass.

Simon says nice things which makes me happy. Because I’m needy like that.

Melinda Doolittle is still my favorite, though. Love her voice, love her personality, love watching her work the stage. Seriously, she’s better at this than all the rest. She doesn’t just know how to sing, she knows how to play an audience, she seems totally genuine, and she is a blast.

Great way to close out the show. Regardless of where she ends up on the show, she will have a hell of a career.

Update: Rob v/ Antonella. Yeah, boy. And Kate offers her thoughts, too.