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Wednesday, May 11, 2005

American Idol: Only a Threesome Remains

The boy with the hole in his throat is going home.

Frankly, he was lucky to stay in as long as he did, and it’s a tribute to fourteen year girls across the nation. Still, his parents seemed like nice people and he seemed nice enough, too.

Here’s hoping he goes on to bigger, better, happy things that don’t ever involve me hearing him sing.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

American Idol: Because I Still Have The Momentum (Updated)

Where are the drugs and the sex scandals? I think the ratings would go up if only they’d let Bo sing “Cocaine” and have Paula announce her upcoming book: The American Idols I’ve Done Naughty Things With.

Instead we get Philly music and country music. Drugs and sex or Philly and country.

Updates are below the fold to save the unsuspecting from infection with American Idol.

Update: For all the folks coming from a search and wondering why Vonzell was crying, this is the only good rumor-mongering I could find on the subject.

Rumors on the reason behind Vonzell’s tears range from a death in the family to the death of a beloved family dog.

This quote from an article on Reality TV Magazine. Enjoy.

And don’t forget to vote for Bo Bice and His Big Bag of Cocaine!

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Wednesday, May 04, 2005

B’Bye, Scotty

Scotty is gone, and none too soon.

Anthony was the worst of the week, but Scott has been dodging bullets for weeks. It caught up with him.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

American Idol: The Scandal of the Week (Updated)

If it isn’t Paula’s naughty relationship with a contestant, it’s Bo Bice’s Big Bag of Cocaine.

Somehow, American Idol just got a lot more fun…

Update: I should probably have a little talk with my lawyers...

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Thursday, April 28, 2005

Bo Bice and His Big Bag of Cocaine

Bo Bice, my favorite in the current American Idol series, has a history with drugs. Which is probably about as surprising to some people as was the fact that Syria might not have been entirely forthcoming about their withdrawal from Lebanon. Anyway, Drudge, the Great Gossip, is linking to a Smoking Gun story about Bo’s felony arrest for cocaine possession and subsequent trip through a drug diversion program.

What can I say but good for him?

Let’s get this straight:

  1. Almost all of my favorite albums were fueled by either drugs or a recent trip through rehab.
  2. Real rockers have a druggy phase. He was just proving his devotion to the genre.
  3. I’ve used coke. And you know what, I liked it. A lot. I mean, if it were made legal, I would buy the occasional 8 ball to share with friends.
  4. What, you could look at this guy and think he wasn’t knee-deep in coke or meth? Please…

To tell the truth, I haven’t touched coke or meth since 1993 or 1994. I haven’t touched any illegal drug since 1997 or 1998. I’ve had a few opportunities, but I’ve turned them down because I don’t like the drugs that make you feel more screwed up than a good beer buzz, I worry about the health effects, and I don’t like the idea of going to jail. So, if I’m ever on the verge of becoming a household name, let it be known that I’ve always been fully forthcoming with my drug history.

To paraphrase the great (deceased) Bill Hicks: never murdered anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, laughed my ass off and went about my day. That isn’t a blanket approval of drug use: some people shouldn’t use drugs the way some people shouldn’t drink and Michael Jackson shouldn’t be left alone with young children.

But for a few of my bartending years--the years immediately Pre-Marriage--I was a regular user of coke and meth. I stopped using by choice one day and never looked back. There was no dramatic withdrawals or trips to a clinic; there were no tearful confessions to a therapist and no regrets.

No regrets about either using or stopping.

So, here’s to Bo and his former drug habit. I hope he’s one of the majority of people who have used drugs: he’s had his fun and he realizes when it no longer fits the life he’s trying to live.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

American Idol: The Hilarious (Updated)

I have to admit: I’m shocked by this week’s vote.

Not Scotty. Not Anthony.

Although I kicked him for his performance last night, I would never have expected Constantine to be going tonight. On the positive side, it gave us the chance to watch his really, extra-special defiant final song. Giggle-worthy only because it sounded just as bad as it did last night.

Heheh. Funny.

Update: On a more important note, ResurrectionSong is the number one MSN search result for Super Happy Sex. How the hell cool is that?

I mean, it won’t stay that way, and it’s all Mark Morford’s fault, but let’s be honest: there’s nowhere better for you to go for Super Happy Sex.

Remember that. It could be important some day.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

American Idol: It’s a Long, Long Ride

I’m back again, talking about the Idol, mocking Paula Abdul, generally agreeing with Simon, and wondering how much longer Scott can stay on the show.

This week, they’ll be showcasing current music. Man, what would I give to hear someone sing Mark Lanegan’s song “Resurrection Song.” Just sayin’.

Read the Rest...

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

American Idol: Because, For Some Reason, I Care

I got back from Jack N’ Grill just in time to miss Constantine, but Simon was brutal.

Trust in Simon. Mostly. Trust in Jack N’ Grill completely.

Read the Rest...

Doolittle Raid

Yesterday marked the 64rd anniversary of Doolittle’s raid on Tokyo. The Washington Times has an excellent write-up of the Doolittle Raid.

It was never part of the plan for the bombers to return to the fleet. While they could take off from a carrier’s deck, it was much too short for landing. An airfield in China had been selected for the planes’ landings, but with the early takeoff it was much too far.

These guys left the flight deck knowing that once they took off they would have no place land. Where we do we get men like this?

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