Friday, June 22, 2012
New Site for the Ruminations of Zombyboy
I’ve moved because the spammers are trying to take over this site. Because I wanted something a little bit new. Because I wanted to break from these hundreds of posts and thousands of comments and do exactly the same thing somewhere else.
Or something like that.
Anyway, I hope that you’ll visit the new site and take part in all the new conversations.
(Oh, and you can comment over there. Which is nice for everyone.
Saturday, April 02, 2011
Charlie Sheen Can’t Even Fail Well
According to Fox, some people weren’t impressed with the first show in Charlie Sheen’s “Torpedo of Dumb” tour. I just can’t figure out why.
What did they expect? Did they expect a better class of failure? A more fun kind of public self-destruction? Or perhaps they hoped for some life-changing wisdom from the colossal ego and his porn star/actress “goddesses.” I know that when I want guidance, the first place I look is a hack actor who probably should have been jailed a number of times over for assaulting and threatening the women in his life. Maybe we can all learn something from a man who has managed to skate through all of his most disastrously dumb decisions and increasingly crazy behavior without having to pay anything resembling a real cost. Except, apparently, in his dental hygiene.
If they are really lucky, maybe he will share his way through the mound of cocaine that just has to be part of his rider.
I’m sure that what they really want is just the big drama and unhinged rants that made him even more famous than the exquisitely bad excuse for a comedy whose only redeeming value is that I kind of have a soft spot in my heart for Ducky. They want the car crash and he just didn’t manage to deliver enough blood.
There’s something sad about a man who can’t even fail with enough panache to keep the mob happy.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Hateful Things: Acura’s Holiday Advertising
If you haven’t seen Acura’s holiday advertising--the “season of reason sales event"--you should watch this video. The ads dare to suggest that all of the overly ostentatious commercialism of the holiday season can be combatted by buying or leasing a new Acura. The logic, apparently, is that springing for a rental reindeer is a symbol of excess and buying a new car is a symbol of “over saving.”
I have nothing against Acura, but these ads make me cranky every time I see them.
(Edited for clarity.)
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Thursday, September 09, 2010
TeleTech Hiring More Than 2,000
If you are jobless in the Denver area, this won’t count as great news, but it might count as good news. According to the Denver Business Journal, TeleTech will be hiring more than 2,000 people in the Denver area. Unfortunately, many of those jobs are temporary, part-time, work-at-home positions--which won’t solve your job problems, but might well help in the short term.
Tuesday, September 07, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
Kindle v/ iBooks
This wouldn’t surprise me in the least:
Friday, August 13, 2010
Apparently Some People Really Do Read it for the Articles
Apple’s strict no-nipple policy in relation to apps sold through the iTunes store is probably a smart decision. If not for that, my guess is that wandering through the app store would feel something like wandering the Vegas Strip. Everywhere you turn, some guy is pushing a little sheet urging you to partake in Becky’s Big Boobieporium.
I have nothing against porn in a general sense, but I really hate it when porn gets all pushy.
Which is why I’m not particularly uptight about the G-rated version of Playboy for the iPad, but, then, I also don’t get the point. Do people really read it for the articles? Are those articles really that good? Or do they need a giant pair of fake, airbrushed bosoms to keep them afloat? I honestly wouldn’t know since I never read it for the articles. I was always in it for the photography.
For cranky folk who will decry Apple’s censorship, I say: if you need porn on your iDevice, then use the browser. Even better, you could buy an Android-based device--Google really does have the porn advantage.
Saturday, July 03, 2010
It is a hot freaking day in Denver and I’m cleaning house. This, of course, necessitates booze. Which, when you’ve just spent too much money on a new TV, an iPad, and tickets for your much-later-in-the-year vacation, doesn’t mean going out and getting something new. It means using what you have on hand and hoping it comes out tasty.
Which is how I got this.
Fill a tall glass with ice (crushed if you can because crushed ice is kind of like bendy straws: it makes almost every beverage taste better) and throw in a shot or two of Absolut Apeach vodka. I err on the side of drunkenness, but you might be strangely attached to sobriety. Put in a few heart dashes of Fee Brothers Rhubarb Bitters, fill the rest of the way with lemonade, and stir.
Then drink it and marvel that is the theirs-quenching wonder of fruit, fruity booze, and a touch of concentrated rhubarb.
Friday, July 02, 2010
You Did What to a Grilled Cheese Sandwich?
This seemed like a good idea to someone. And to someone’s boss. And to a focus group that inevitably had to try the thing.
I’m tempted to make a comment about contemporary America that references wars, recessions, and either the wealth or the willful blindness of our society.
But, hell, it’s just a sandwich.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
If by Any Weird Chance…
...You happen to be attending the Hillhead 2010 show, let me know. If you have any pictures, I’d love to see them.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Idiocy in Edinburgh
If you’re a gun nut, this story will have you screaming. If you aren’t, then you might still find the five year jail sentence handed down to be ridiculous.
Me, I guess I’m more on the gun nut side of that scale.
Unjust and disproportionate, indeed. An 80 year old Czech pistol with no ammunition isn’t worth a five year sentence.
Of course, I’m one of those weirdos who doesn’t believe that I need the government’s permission to be allowed to defend myself and to own the right tools for that defense.
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
Breaking News: Justin Bieber is an Idiot
Of course, you already knew that because there is no way in hell that Justin Bieber fans frequent RSong. That’s just not possible.
But, in case you needed proof, here is Bieber displaying his idiocy.
Batch 19 Pre-Prohibition Style Lager: It’s Not For You
I like beer. I want to try Batch 19 Pre-Prohibition Style Lager.
Yet, living in Denver, and not in one of a very few target cities, I won’t be sampling the old recipe brew.
Now, people in Colorado drink a lot of beer. Significantly more than folks in San Francisco, for instance. So the idea of not selling this beer in Coors’ own back yard is a surprise to me.
The only reason for such a crazy decision, in my estimation, is that they are trying to foist crappy beer off on those latte-sippin’, Volvo-drivin’ lefties in San Franciso, the so-schnockered-they-can’t-tell-the-difference drinkers in Milwaukee and Chicago, and a political class in DC that just doesn’t know any better. Because it’s obvious that they are trying to hide the brew from the real beer fans in Colorado.
It’s a conspiracy.
Read the rest. And rub it in if you happen to be in one of those six target markets.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Friday, April 23, 2010
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Headlines That Shoulda Been, Part II
“Deepak Chopra Admits to Be Earth-Shakingly Irritating.”
According to a ridiculously cursory Google search, Mr. Chopra once said, “If you and I are having a single thought of violence or hatred against anyone in the world at this moment, we are contributing to the wounding of the world...”
I’ll be meditating on that later this evening. Be on the lookout for world wounding.
Monday, April 05, 2010
He Wasn’t a Sex Addict. He Was Just Cheating.
I find it funny--if funny can be an appropriate word in the context of what will surely be a painful and ugly split--that Jesse James is giving up on his sex addiction therapy.
If he were truly sorry, if he truly felt that he was an addict, and if he truly wanted to improve his life in a material way, he would finish his stay at the clinic. Instead he realized that the typical template of public apologies, scripted press releases, carefully managed stays in rehab followed up by doing the rounds on the talk show circuit where accepting responsibility means blaming the most convenient addiction wasn’t going to end with reconciliation. I can’t imagine that James has ever cared much about public opinions, so if it wasn’t going to save his marriage, why bother with the play?
After all, I’m sure he’ll find a wealth of tattooed white trash to fill his time. James wasn’t a sex addict; he was just cheating.
I do feel bad for Bullock, though. The shame and embarrassment of publicly dealing with divorce and infidelity isn’t easy under normal circumstances; in a year that should have been the best of her career, she’s instead facing front page stories, lurid pictures, and accusations about her husband that have surely turned that triumph into bitter ash.
Which is why calling the story funny doesn’t feel quite right.
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