resurrectionsong

July 11, 2003

Mark Morford Might Just Explode

Given Mark Morford's well-documented, consuming hatred for all things Wal-Mart related, this news might best be kept from him.

Wal-Mart, the world's biggest retailer, opened its first outlet in China's capital Friday, making its inaugural foray into a major Chinese city after setting up 22 stores elsewhere in the country.

Thousands of shoppers packed the cavernous Sam's Club store on the far western edge of Beijing, testing out electronics, puzzling over imported cheese and loading shopping carts full of beer, paper towels and fresh seafood.

Members of the "Let's Riot Against Starbucks" wings of loony parties around the world are sure to be disturbed by the news. I mean, that darned Wal-Mart will drive out all the little local businesses--it's just another sign of American cultural imperialism, and gosh knows the world doesn't need any of that consumer-oriented capitalist crap, right?

What these nuts miss is the simple fact that no store can sell something to a person who doesn't want it. If all the poor, culturally-oppressed-by-the-US people think that what they already have is do damned great, they won't bother with Wal-Mart. But for the wing nuts like Morford it isn't a matter of choice, it's a matter of denying choice to those terribly picturesque and oh-so-oppressed peasants around the world.

Why the Morfords of the world so desperately need picturesque peasants isn't quite so clear.

Here's to Wal-Mart in Beijing from a happy, Starbucks-drinking, Target-shopping, McDonalds-eating capitalist.

Read about Beijing's new Wal-Mart.

Posted by zombyboy at July 11, 2003 01:12 PM | TrackBack

Comments

Hell yeah!

Actually, I'd kind of like to put this in the hands of Mr. Morford. I keep thinking one of these days we'll get lucky and his head will explode from sheer impotent rage.

On the other hand, we'd have to find somebody new to make fun of if that happened.

Posted by: Deb at July 11, 2003 01:38 PM

Er, sorry for running off with your phrasing there. I think I'd better go have lunch now.

Posted by: Deb at July 11, 2003 01:40 PM

Actually, the last time I wrote about him, I emailed to let him know. I doubt he cared--but I hope it either made him laugh or pissed him off.

Either response is acceptable.

Posted by: zombyboy at July 11, 2003 01:48 PM

Good one. Heh.

Posted by: Deb at July 11, 2003 02:10 PM

All of your IQ's added up together don't even come close to Mark Morford's. You are so typical of the right-wing illiterate clowns who pepper message boards with non-sensical, irrational, barely literate hate propaganda against anyone who disagrees with them. I almost feel sorry for you...well, almost.

Posted by: Jen at April 11, 2004 07:07 PM